"Come check out the Net," my friend said with a smile.
"You can look up SMALL TREE FROGS or chat for awhile."
CHAT?!?!?! . . . hazel eys lit up with great glee . . .
With real people you mean? Chatting with ME??
COOOOOOOOOOOL!!! I said as I used a search engine
And typed in "CHAT LINES" then punched the key ENTER.

BUNCHES of chat lines! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!
I excitedly clicked on one called . . . IMS . . .
Well, that's all she wrote, I never went farther.
My mind was consumed with a burning desire
To reach out and touch all those strangers, you see.
And some of them wanting to REALLY touch me . . .!

Oh what a rush! What a damn heady feeling!
All of a sudden, my life, it had meaning.
To chat with the nice folk and torture the stinkers,
The weirdos, the oddballs, the perverts, the wankers . . .
More joy than this poor little heart could withstand . . .!
My "verbal abuse" was the best in the land . . .

But, then over time as the months went on longer,
Something odd happened . . . the friendships grew stronger.
I'd eagerly wait for the names to appear
Of the friends that I'd made, off and on, here and there.
A Circle of Friendship grew up and was nourished . .
With kindness and caring and humor, it flourished.

The friends that I've made are the bestest of kinds . . .
Some are old standing and some are new minds . . .
But each has become really special to me
And I write this thing now hoping that they will see
That they've taken up residence, or so it would seem,
In my life . . . in my heart . . . on my monitor screen.

The Queen of the bunch?? Why, that's Lady Kitana . . .
Don't mess with her, buddy, ya really don't wanna . . .!
Her Flame Thrower husband, or just . . . Killer Bunny
Comes on now and then . . . he's hysterically funny.
My oldest of friends is the man Midnight Caller.
My green-jello-swimming, Let's-Make-A-Deal talker.

Smokin's the Wizard of HTML's
Just don't call him BOY, or he'll make your life hell!
Then there's Sincerely, artistic and wise.
All you guys just can't wait for her kissing driveby's.
Deadeye's artistic, but BOY! Am I pissed . ..
He butchered my picture and wiped out my tits!

Then there's Jaded Lady . .. my partner in crime . ..
When it comes to male torture, she's right there in line.
And Doc, Mr. Destiny . . .HUBBA HUBBA all right!
Got a strange taste for something he calls "Vegemite."
My favorite pupil . . . Tawny Owl, it would seem . . .
Is a natural when it comes to the art of male bashing.

SLY GUY . . . um . . . he calls himself SLY KIDD . . .
The poor boy still doesn't know what the hell "that" is . . .
Sgt. Pepper is a young one, but girls, he is sweet
Makes you want to reach out, pinch them cute FROGGY cheeks!
Dragon Slayer enters with flare on most days
And I gotta tell ya makes a great Ice Cream Sundae . .

CB and Dro and their cybercouch . . . well . ..
It's still got that godawful wet ewok smell . . .
So many friends that I've met through the days
There's KsTaz, Georgia Peach and of course Kami K
JMD Blaze, HonEBear, Dream Come True . . .
Cynthia, Minn, Judgmental and Drew.

The best for the last, I guess you could say
Is BAR TENDER (slash) CYCLIST (slash) ELKRUB (slash) RAY
Tending the bar through the furor and havoc
Calm and collected . . . our resident psychic!
Knows every song on the juke box and then some
Mind like a steel trap . . . the man's friggin' awesome!